Monday, March 9, 2015

Modest Monday: Is Modesty Just for Women?

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When I was a child I often heard discussions about modesty and it was always towards females. These discussions range from the length of women’s clothing, to hair, and how she behaves. But the actually term modesty was never used for men. I found this to be true not only in church but secondary school and university. In various churches I often heard messages and sermons of how women should be modest. There were a few mentions of men’s lack of dress code and moral but few ever mentioned that their clothing or behavior was provocative or lustful.  

When I attended school there was no difference. The dress codes would be enforced more on females than males. The reason that I say this is because more females were sent home for dress code violations than males. But just as many of the male student body was violating the dress code. When I went to university I thought, well things might change because we are all adults who are intelligent, surely we would be less unequal.

But again I was so wrong and I find this out when preparing for career fairs.  Professors and mentors would often say “now young ladies do not be wearing tight skirts, pant suits, or low cut blouses because you want to be taken seriously”. Not once was the mention of tight suits seminars given to men, despite the fact some would be wearing very tight pants and shirts. No one ever told them to cover up their butt so you will not be seen has tempting to someone.
These ignorant and traditional discussions often led to a battle of the sexes. 

A lot of young women that I grew up including myself felt that it was a double standard for our male peers. The boys and excuse my language could raise Cain and still the finger wagging would be directed mostly at the girls. It made me wonder if modesty was just for females and not males. These boys basically wore what they wanted, talked how they wanted, and acted how they wanted. When the young women would speak up the adults would that old and tired “say boys will be boys” argument.

As I got older I realized that this belief not only is not fair but is completely wrong. Men can be immodest and cause difficulties for females. I have seen men going half naked in the summer time (not just at the pool or beach) and women would have to avert their eyes in the other direction. Men walk around with their undies showing with their sagging pants or their tight jeans but no one says anything about it. I also hear men say some of the most vulgar things to females or be big flirts. I have also seen men spend ridiculous amounts on their clothes especially Air Jordan’s, hats, and suits.  But I rarely hear that they are behaving immodestly.  

New flash, just as Christian women who have a relationship with God have to be modest in their speech, thinking, behavior, and clothing so do men. This is why I think there needs to more inclusive discussion to Christian males about modest because they too should want to be pleasing to God!   


Stay to next week for fashion Modest Monday and an announcement about a new Monday line up addition!


Lanae Bond 


  1. Amen. The same standards apply to both the male and female children of the Lord. Good point.

    1. I am glad you mentioned that! If we all are children of God regardless of our gender we should want to maintain His standards! Thanks for stopping by!


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